The Perilous Hash

Another Monday has arrived in Dushanbe (this would be a funny statement if you spoke Tajik because Dushanbe means Monday). The skies have mostly cleared and are blue again and all this comes on the heels of a very entertaining weekend.

Things got started on Friday when a colleague threw himself a farewell BBQ at the Hyatt – this time I seem to have adjusted enough to avoid another case of Tajik Tummy. We had a great time and after the food we went up to the Presidential Suite where my departing colleague was staying and continued to party. It was quite a posh set of rooms and the wine was very good. Plus the hotel kept bringing up beer bottles on ice in large silver bowls. I have to say the setting rivaled some of the fanciest parties I ever attended while in advertising. A very unexpected, but very welcome surprise here in Dushanbe.

On Saturday morning we got our Household Effects shipment – interestingly, the ground shipment arrived before the air shipment. It was like Christmas in August. There were so many things we forgot we even had. The movers were very professional and careful – nothing like the ones you find in the U.S. In fact, they were appalled at how our belongings were packed and to be honest, we’re lucky that only one item broke – a large porcelain planter. I don’t know how our china and glasswear survived since the movers just packed it as-is without any extra padding. Nonetheless, we are reunited with the majority of our belongings and Stephanie is already having fun putting our house together – and doing a great job I might add.

Saturday afternoon, I completed my first Hash. As mentioned in the last post, the Hash House Harriers are an international group for expatriates which has chapters in many foreign cities. It’s primarily a social organization and the way it works is that everyone meets up at a designated point and we carpool to the start of the Hash. Earlier in the day, the person who is designated as the Hare sets a trail for everyone else (the Hounds) to follow. There is a system to it and there may be false trails, so every so often there are checkpoints where people must fan out to try to find the correct trail. Once sure of the correct trail, everyone takes off running along the trail to the next checkpoint and so on and so forth. Oh, and everyone yells what’s going on so that people in the back can follow since everyone moves at different paces so it’s a fairly raucous proceeding.

Our trail was up in the hills outside of Dushanbe and it went up steep slopes and along cliff-like trails, up and down and all around. It was a blast just running all over the place. The scenery was amazing and it was just a lot of fun. Of course, there were the odd mishaps – early in the run I had to use my hands to get up a particularly steep slope and apparently was impaled by a thorny plant since my hand was all bloody when we finished. Then, about halfway through, the trail led us through a wasp nest and many of us, including yours truly, were stung. I only got stung once – and it hurt like the dickens, but several people were stung multiple times. It turned out one guy was allergic and had to go for medical treatment. I successfully managed to dodge most of the animal droppings along the way, but rolled my ankle on the last downhill stretch when I landed on a loose rock after jumping a pile of dung. Still, I maintain that it was a great experience and can’t wait for next week.

After the Hash is where things really got interesting. At the end of the train there was beer and water. I had a water and then discovered that there was a type of Baltica that I had never heard of. You may recall that there are Baltica’s 1-9 and each has a different flavor. I found a Baltica 0 and was excited when one of the British guys (expats from many countries do the Hash) didn’t even know it. After everyone finished the run, we headed over to the house of one of the Hares (a French guy) and as I was finishing my Baltica 0 a bunch of people started laughing at me – it turned out Baltica 0 is non-alcoholic. What a waste.

Needless to say, I rectified my mistake as soon as we got into the yard. It was a good thing I had a little beer in me because as a first time Hasher I had to stand inside the circle and dance. A lot of other things happened in the circle, but I don’t think I’ll recount them all here. If anyone comes to visit with even the slightest inclination, I’ll be happy to take you on a Hash and you can see for yourself. Overall, it was a fantastic experience and I met a lot of new people. Dinner was also provided, so I’d call it a big win. Before we move on to Sunday, I should note that Saturday night when I got home dirty, sweaty, bloody and tired, my wasp sting had subsided to a small welt on my leg – remember that.

Sunday we woke up bright and early to go to the car market. A co-worker and her Tajik fiancée offered to take us and another couple. So we met them near the Italian place where we had dinner our first night and walked down the main road – Rudaki – until we came to a place where we could catch a Marshrutka. This was our first voyage in a marshrutka and it was quite an experience. They are tiny little vans that hold about 6 people comfortably – although I have seen them with many more passengers crammed in. They run on predetermined routes but stop anywhere to pick up or let off. The great thing is that they only cost 1 somoni (less than a quarter) no matter where you go on the route. The car market is on the far outskirts of town, so it was a big savings.

We got to the car market, which is basically a huge field at the bottom of a steep hill that was literally covered with cars. We spent some time walking around and getting information so that later we can call the owners and have them bring the cars in for inspection and, if we’re interested, negotiation. That will be another story when it happens. The car market wasn’t nearly as hectic as we expected – no one tried to hassle us or anything – but as the morning wore on it got very hot and we tired quickly. I also noticed that my leg was hurting a lot and when I lifted up my pant leg I saw that my small welt had grow to a large red swelling on my calf. Not nice.

When we got back to the town proper, we had lunch at an Iranian restaurant and refreshed with cold water. It was all delicious. After lunch, Stephanie and I decided to walk down to the large bazaar – the Green Market - to see if it was any different than the one we hit last week – several people had recommended it. It was definitely bigger, but not better. The selection was mostly the same, but it was much more crowded and obnoxious. Beggar women constantly followed us and whenever we stopped to try to negotiate they would start tapping me on the arm – none of the many ways of saying know that I’ve learned seemed to work. At one point, a woman who was selling to us had to tell one of them off. Needless to say, we’ll probably be sticking to our nice quiet bazaar from now on.

On the way home, we got to put our newly learned marshrutka savvy to the test. We found our street and lo and behold – a number 4 marshrutka pulled up and we hopped on. Miraculously, it took us just where we wanted to go. I won’t lie – I was pretty pleased with myself. Once at home, we both pretty much collapsed and enjoyed the A/C. By this time, my leg was quite painful and it was difficult to walk. When I went to ice it, my small welt had grown to encompass my entire calf and was blotchy red. The whole area was swollen and hot.

The ice was a temporary fix and when I got to work the medical officer gave me some Benadryl and a steroid to help with the swelling. I guess it will take some time to kick in, the only thing that’s changed is that the Benadryl made me sleepy. Anyway, I wear this lump of feverish red flesh as a badge of honor for completing my first Hash. I hope the next one avoids any stinging insects! All in all, the only thing I can think to say is my new favorite quote – “Isn’t fun a wonderful thing to have!?” I think so and I’m having quite a bit of it.

Until next time…